Well , suddenly remembered that this blog have been left to rot for ages. and... here i am trying to post something, but the moment i logged into blogger, i lost the mood to blog!! ahahahaha , typical uhh... okok , so chinese O's paper is coming up which is TOMORROW , and I'm trying to score at least an A1 or A2 which i have to depend on my paper which is my best :))) and next monday is the last O level paper!!!! which is .... Combined Science mcq :DD after that, it's partyyyy time guys !!!!!!! vwooooo

shit, i actually emo today. even for that short while. I felt vulnerable. NO. shouldn't be this way. it's not suppose to be me that's feeling that way, it should be you. yea, this should be the last time for me. actually. i feel that human are selfish, well, obviously, they are selfish. When they need you, they come running to you, after that ? they just throw you and leave you to die. alone and bitter. that's my impression of you guys now. everything changed, friends, relationship, family, well, not everything is supposed to be perfect , right? you just have to adapt to those situations, make yourself stronger. :) dont say that you're there for me, cause you dont. you just gave me those few words and run off, leaving me in the same depressed state. But, nahh, dont worry, when it's your turn , i would even console you ^^. omg, i'm becoming a hater, no, apparently, i am already a hater in people eyes. who cares ?! i'm me and this is me. i know there are those who really care, but, i just cant get those shit outta my head. i feel like breaking down whenever i start thinking, really. i just cant control it. i tried to stop thinking, but the result is that i would think even more. i dont want to either. i just wish that there would be someone. someone who's willing to listen to me, understand. but FML, there isn't and there won't be one. no offence meant, but seriously, i dont kinda like my classmates. Not that kind of meaning, but it's like i think some of them are just born idiotic. doing idiotic things and acting like one. LOL. nevermind. i seriously need counselling. really. damn. i dont know where to find one and the courage to go . DAMMN

i often stop to think if things in life are really worth it , after much serious thinking. i though no, they are not worth it, but in the end, i would often chase after things that arent worth my time. seriously. no one freaking cares. shitloadsofcraps. damn. ijustfeellikegettingoutofschool!

Store in charge changed from tomorrow onwards. well,i'll miss you guys , :) . all those happy memories:)hais, shall continue the good memories with the rest of my colleagues there:)

well, second day of school. currently , i'm still keeping up with my cheerful attitude. but i think it's crazyyy !!! LOL!.. sad to say, changed of seating arrangement today :( sad ttm!! hahaa, i didnt talk much , therefore i'm still at the back of the class, my favourite seat!! but sad to say. liying left me for douglas!!!! LOL!! sounds wrong, but she left seating with me and went to seat with douglas instead ! :X anyway, Audrey seat with me instead! lol, gonna be crazy, brenda infront of me, jerome too. lolol. i think i would laugh over the slighest thing. lOl. :D haha, it's good to laugh you know, keeps you young^^ went compass to slack after school . and off hoomeee, shucks. set my alarm at 5.15pm, but slept to 5.55pm instead, nearly late for my tuition ... duhh. ?and damn, i'm addicted to the 7-11 hot chocolate. D: why doesnt our school have a 7-11?

upcoming events : Work on Friday , Saturday. :):):):):):):)
: O level chinese result on 10 jan.

to do : Be happy
: dont think too much
: Homeworkkkss! D:

F&N tomorroww . 9 more months. 9 more months and it'll be over, out of this damn school. get a good grade, go to a poly. meet new people. enjoy life. !! 9more months!! I CAN DO IT

Went out alot this few days. money gone like waatterrrr.. omggggg!! Went to Jasmine house one Christmas:D funfunfun!! ton at her house, went home at 8am. slept till 1pm.. then went out for primary school gathering:D they go KBOX ! OMG, damn. i didnt sing at all. as you know. if you hear me sing, means you're very fortunate.. D: shall try to sing la. but can't get over the "stress?" -.- anyway after that, went marina barrage and talk till 1am plus. and cab back to buangkok to slack with peeps. seriously, i think my primary school friend is AWESOME. AWESOME TTM ♥ !

well,today got back Ns level result. 15 points. i must say that i was so so afraid that i was not gonna make it. had Ms Toh farewell thingy too. as for darren. well, all i could say is. all the happy memories and fun would be remembered and missed. well, hope you'll buck up in whatever school you'll go. hope that you will succeed. saw kinda a few people cry today. makes me so emo. but well, life's a bitch, people leaving and stuffs. so why dont we cherish waht we have now before we lose another one? although we pass Ns, but there's Os , good luck all. ..
:(

feel that i have neglected my friends. lol. why bother making someone else your friend when they dont want to? shall just stick to myself. sometimes i thnk. if i change to a more zi bi behaviour, will it be alright?

i just get so pissed over stupid answers and questions. why? what ? wtf. it hard trying you know. making people your priority in life whereas they make others theirs. you think i'm what? robot? no feelings? wth. i m still alive and kicking here hello,? wtf. omg. seriously. dont give people comfort when you feel like giving and then kicking them aside when you're busy. detest this kind of people. mutherfucking piece of shit

chalet wasnt as fun as expected. but however, it was nice meeting up freidns you havent see in some time. miss you lots you know. ? lol. i mean freinds -.- anyway. hope that i'll promote and see you guys agn next yearr..

why sia. really eh. friends issue always fuck me up. JAs & clique. idk what to say. that benjamin and dominick -.- . tony ley. got jovi. become inseperable. fuck.. FUCK LA. Srsly. i think that i ought to be more social. really. dont give a fuck. live w/o anyone. yeah. fuck. FCUK. FUCK -,- -'- sua. Knnbccb

Boring yesterday, practically rotting at home whole day. :x.
thanks Aaron for the movie anyway :)

and yeah , i dont know what wrong with me. seriously, you guys may think i'm weird or whatever fuk.but doyou guys ever put yourself in my postition and think from my point of view? yeah. i'm just being used for all of your entertainmen. i'm sure about that. need me, find me. dont need me, just throw me aside. thanks a million. really . whats the fuck is wrong with me. FK. seriously. i think i have mental issues. FML. FML . Fuck you. Why do i keep thinking? why ? Fuck.. i really need to let my frustration. why am i always the second , or maybe last? why why why?FK. yeah. use me for all you can now. cause someday. i;m gonan fuck your life upside down SO badly. but, now. i will just emo like a fuker.

444th Post.
lol. guess that it's gonna be another day rotting at home? hais. kinda sad now, idk why also. shouldnt supposed to feel like this. but , i dont know why too. i know i love you, you dont know i love you. i want to tell you how i feel, but i dont know how to tell you how i feel about you. damn. Nothing is the same anymore. those who know me will know. i'm not the old me. i emo now, i get upset easily, i get angry easily, i get jealous easily. last time, all of this doesnt bother me at all. i would just laugh and laugh everyday. maybe i've grown up. feelings are shown more forcefully. but wheres my Guts? the guts to tell you i love you. but. i know it's one sided only. i'm kinda happy that for some time in my life, friends are there for me. but, now ? idk how to say too. but i've got a feeling that we've drift. all of us , yes. but i need you more than anything . too bad, i don have the courage to tell you :( hope that someday i do, and when that time comes, it would be two sided . :X lets hope so , right?

re-reading all my past blog posts make me so happy. but.. alot have changed.

WOW! Thanks LotS! for treating me like a fool and idiot! love TTM sia! ♥ THANKS :D

idk. but i think its best this way.

feeling depressed now .

been reading people blog as maple is down. Was kinda happy that at least we all shared some memories together. however, things have totally change, didnt it? i dint even know when it all started. by those one or twopeople. then. it all changes.. majorly depressed. i dont know where i stand, why i exist for. what am i doing. waht i am to everyone. yeah,i know . people would probably say, ohh. emo again. heckcare. nah.i'm not emoing. it's just my thoughts. really kinda wish to enjoy this holiday.but well. impossible right? haha. actually i'm still kinda surprised that you guys would even talk to me. lol. anyway. yeah. continue to be hermit crab^x^

seriously, i think its kinda idiotic la. not you but the things you do, er, you say you wanna work? ask me find. ok. then say no money. ok. BUt you no money still can go out siol?! ask you when find, never reply. wth? dont want find tell me la. dont like sixian ley. wtf. why also got things let me feel like a idiot. -.- zzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzz. nvm.

feel like we've drifted, friends from secondary one and all. kinda saddening. but this is life , isnt it? seperations. stuffs. hope that all wil be better .

today i'm talking about love.
if you think that this is nonsense.then please. get out of my blog.

well. i think that relationship are just crap.i mean , well . you are happy and loved in a relationship. but seriously. do you guys ever see blogs of those who're in a relationship? there would be iloveyou.imissyou.iloveyouforever. blahblahblah.yeah, it's kinda sweet. but when they breakup. well it turns into hate words. i mean wtf? saying iloveyou forever and when you guys breakup, after a few months, both parties have new bf/gf and the whole cycle restart. -.- and i think that those who are over dependant on relationship are kinda naive. please. be independant. so what if the guy or girl leaves you? plenty of other good catches out there. yeah. feeling is important, but no point clinging on to someone who doesnt love you back. seeing things at same level is important too. else conflict would be endless.quarreling over small matters. and ohyes.i hate those people who love someone alot for a moment. and when the feeling fades. he/she start to see each other as an eyesore. wtf ? please. dont be so childish.can still be friends . -.- . okay. go back to rotting in maple. .. no life kid. yeah i know.

gahhhh, stayed at hommee the whoooleeeee day. wtfzxz. wanted to go out to buy Stuffs in the morning. went there. then see the shop haven open. was thinking to myself. eh wierd ley. then i realized casue it's only 8am in the morning. super dumb la.-.- went home. rooted infront of the computer for 12 hours , eh nono , 15 hours. WTF?! :P wednesday outing cancel. is like wtf. -.- hais. nevermind. tomorrow maybe going out. hope that i'll have the mood to go? lol. not mood actually , is money! LOL! i think i have enough, do i? er, yeah, i think i have. lol. that's all? i think. haha. kinda happy with it this way too. seriously. not involving in stuffs. but observing as a bystander. Karma dude .KARMA